Signs of a Savior Complex and How to Overcome It

A savior complex is a desire to control and assist people to the point of neglecting your own well-being.

Symptoms of a Savior Complex

• Deriving self-worth from being the sole source of help for someone
• Inability to say "no" to requests, even at personal expense
• Lack of boundaries on time and energy
• Neglecting self-care to meet others' needs
• Continuing to help until burnout
• Being attracted to "damaged" people in need of saving
• Feeling responsible for others' happiness or unhappiness
• Resentment when help is not appreciated
• Protecting others from consequences of their actions
• Drawing self-worth from helping others

Causes of a Savior Complex

• Trauma or grief, especially if unable to help someone important
• Being "parentified" or forced to take on adult responsibilities in childhood
• Low self-esteem

Consequences of a Savior Complex

• Stress and burnout
• Resentment and anger
• Damaged relationships
• Taken advantage of by others
• Neglect of personal needs and goals
• Mental health problems, including depression and anxiety

Overcoming a Savior Complex

• Recognize the behavior and its consequences
• Take responsibility for your actions and motivations
• Strengthen self-worth and self-esteem
• Take care of yourself, including self-care and setting boundaries
• Set clear, decisive boundaries and learn to say "no"
• Seek professional help if needed

While helping others is important, it should not come at the expense of your well-being. If you struggle with a savior complex, recognizing the signs and taking steps to overcome it can improve your mental and emotional health.