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She/Her Pronouns:

Meaning and Usage Guide

She, Her, Hers: The Basics

  • She/her/hers are gender-specific pronouns typically used for women and girls.
  • They may also be used by gender nonconforming, nonbinary, or gender-expansive individuals.
  • Using someone's correct pronouns validates their identity and affirms their gender.
  • Incorrect pronoun usage can be hurtful and harmful.
  • Recognizing and respecting an individual's pronouns is a crucial aspect of inclusive communication.

Historical Context

  • The pronouns "she" and "her" originated in the 12th century.
  • Prior to this, gendered pronouns were phonetically similar, making their distinction challenging.

The Importance of Pronoun Usage

  • Correct pronoun usage validates an individual's identity and gender.
  • It contributes to improved well-being and mental health outcomes.
  • Using incorrect pronouns can lead to feelings of invalidation, hurt, and discrimination.
  • Respecting someone's pronouns is a fundamental aspect of fostering positive interactions.

Who Uses She/Her Pronouns?

  • Primarily women and girls.
  • Individuals who identify as nonbinary, gender-fluid, gender nonconforming, gender expansive, or genderqueer.
  • Anyone who feels that she/her pronouns best represent their identity.

Pronouns in Bios: Why and How

  • Including pronouns in one's bio provides clarity and reduces the need for asking.
  • It normalizes pronoun-sharing and alleviates awkwardness.
  • Social media and dating apps commonly offer spaces for pronoun inclusion.
  • Sharing pronouns publicly makes it easier for others to refer to you correctly.

Four Gender Pronouns

  • Gendered: She/her, he/him (associated with feminine and masculine identities).
  • Non-gendered: They/them (inclusive for various identities).
  • Neopronouns: Ze/zir, ne/nir, etc. (non-binary or gender-expansive).

How to Ask About Pronouns

  • Approach respectfully and without hesitation.
  • Ask directly and clearly, avoiding terms like "preferred" pronouns.
  • Understand that pronouns are not a choice but reflect a person's identity.

What to Do When You Get Pronouns Wrong

  • Apologize briefly and sincerely.
  • Correct your mistake and use the correct pronouns moving forward.
  • Avoid dwelling on the mistake; move on and learn from it.
  • Embrace the acronym A.C.M.: Apologize, Correct, Move On.

Educational Resources

  • "What's Your Pronoun? Beyond He and She": Explores pronoun history, language, and gender for adults and older readers.
  • "Us: An Intro to Pronouns": An inclusive read aimed at LGBTQIA+ youth.

Affirming Your Child's Gender-Expansive Identity

  • Engage in open communication to understand their pronoun preferences.
  • Respect their chosen pronouns and affirm their gender identity.
  • Seek educational resources and support groups for guidance.

Pronoun usage is an integral part of respecting and validating an individual's gender identity. By being mindful of pronoun use and fostering inclusive communication, we create environments where everyone feels recognized and affirmed in their identity.

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