Idealization and Devaluation in Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is characterized by intense and unstable relationships, difficulty regulating emotions, impulsivity, and an unstable self-image. Idealization and devaluation are defense mechanisms frequently seen in people with BPD, involving extreme shifts in attitudes, beliefs, and feelings towards another person.

Understanding Splitting

The rapid shift between idealization and devaluation in BPD is known as splitting. Splitting reflects a disturbance in thinking and emotional regulation, particularly in integrating positive and negative aspects of a person or situation. It may be an attempt to protect oneself from emotional pain and conflict.

Idealization

Idealization is a psychological process where someone attributes overly positive qualities to another person or thing. In BPD, idealization often occurs at the start of a relationship. The person with BPD may perceive their new partner as perfect, flawless, and capable of fulfilling all their needs. This idealization can lead to intense feelings of love, admiration, and attachment.

Devaluation

Devaluation is the opposite of idealization. It is a defense mechanism where someone characterizes themselves, another person, or an object as entirely flawed, worthless, or possessing exaggerated negative qualities. In BPD, devaluation often occurs when the person with BPD feels threatened, insecure, or disappointed by their partner. They may suddenly view their partner as untrustworthy, manipulative, or even evil.

The Cycle of Splitting

Idealization and devaluation often occur in a cycle. When someone with BPD idealizes their partner, they may overlook their partner's flaws and minimize any negative behavior. However, as the relationship progresses and the person with BPD feels insecure or threatened, they may start devaluing their partner. This devaluation can lead to conflict, arguments, and even the end of the relationship.

Other Conditions Involving Idealization and Devaluation

While idealization and devaluation are primarily associated with BPD, they can also occur in other personality disorders, such as narcissistic and antisocial personality disorders. In these disorders, idealization and devaluation may be used to regulate internal and external conflicts that cause anxiety and shame.

Seeking Help

If you recognize idealization and devaluation patterns in your behavior, it's essential to seek help from a mental health professional. These defense mechanisms can cause significant distress and relationship problems. A therapist can help you understand the underlying causes of your behaviors and develop healthier coping mechanisms.