Learn from Former Bachelor Nick Viall: Steer Clear of Texting Your Ex on Their Birthday

Dive into the insightful podcast conversation between Amy Morin, LCSW, and Nick Viall, where they explore strategies for optimal thinking, feeling, and performance in life. Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts.

Guest: Nick Viall

Remember Nick Viall from popular TV shows like "The Bachelor," "The Bachelorette," and "Bachelor in Paradise"? Now, he hosts "The Viall Files" podcast, where he delves into relationship dynamics. Nick also authored the book titled "Don't Text Your Ex Happy Birthday: And Other Advice on Love, Sex, and Dating."

Nick's Mental Strength Perspective

Nick candidly shares his experiences of public scrutiny in his romantic life, including infidelity, failed engagements, and rejections. Acknowledging his own mistakes in these relationships, he now offers valuable insights gained from these experiences. While not a relationship therapist, he's learned tough lessons in the world of love and dating.

Episode Highlights

• Understanding the difference between expectations and boundaries
• Why we deceive ourselves in relationships
• Setting and enforcing boundaries while dating
• Recognizing boundaries are for self-benefit, not solely for the other person
• The impact of ego on healthy relationships
• Differentiating between pet peeves and non-negotiables
• Identifying your non-negotiables
• How dating apps have transformed the dating scene
• Distinguishing between emotions and emotional connections
• Choosing pain over boredom in relationships
• Why you should resist texting your ex on their birthday
• Overcoming the fear of being cheated on
• The importance of patience with oneself

Mental Health and Mental Strength Insights

• Relationships can reflect existing mental strength and offer opportunities for further development.
• Insecurity and unhealed emotional wounds often manifest in relationships, leading to emotional hurt and uncertainty.
• Relationships provide ample opportunities for self-awareness and daily mental strength building.

Nick's Quotes

• "We desire that fairytale ending, but sometimes we just have to be willing to press play, watch the movie, see if we like it, and then decide if we want to continue watching."

• "Sometimes we will succumb to things like boredom and loneliness. And we will fixate on what our egos are telling us, and we will seek validation rather than what might be better for our hearts."

• "Keep learning about the person you're dating and be open to discovering more, even if there's a risk of finding out something you don't like, because the more you learn, the more exciting it is."

More About the Podcast

The Verywell Mind Podcast is available on all streaming platforms. Leave a review on Apple Podcasts to support the show and encourage others to prioritize mental health.

Note: This transcript may contain inaccuracies and grammatical errors as it hasn't undergone our standard editorial process. For media inquiries, contact Amy here.

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