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Uncovering the Traits of a Serial Cheater: Insights from a Psychiatrist

1. Pattern of Deception: - Serial cheaters exhibit a recurring pattern of deception, particularly in regards to their intimacy choices and preferences. They may present their behavior as a desire for sexual novelty or a compulsion, concealing the genuine emotional connection they seek.

2. History of Betrayal: - Individuals with a past history of cheating are more likely to engage in infidelity again. Those who cheat in their first relationship have a three times higher risk of perpetuating cheating behavior in subsequent relationships.

3. Hidden Devices: - Serial cheaters often exhibit secretive behaviors, such as hiding phones, laptops, or tablets, to conceal their history of cheating or ongoing infidelity.

4. Impulsivity: - Poor impulse control can be a sign of serial cheating. It may indicate underlying psychiatric conditions that require attention.

5. Emotional Challenges: - Serial cheating is often associated with emotional health issues, including bipolar disorder, ADHD, substance-induced behavioral disorders, sexual addiction, and attachment problems.

6. Disregard for Commitment: - Serial cheaters often demonstrate a lack of interest in monogamous relationships. They may downplay the significance of cheating, implying a past history of infidelity.

Impact on Relationships: - Serial cheating negatively affects both the cheater and the betrayed partner, causing emotional distress and potentially leading to relationship breakdown. - For the cheater, repeating the behavior reinforces negative self-beliefs and further damages their self-esteem.

Identifying a Serial Cheater: - Serial cheaters may have unhealthy relationships with parents, siblings, and friends, indicating a lack of long-term, healthy dynamics. - Resistance to addressing mental health issues is common among serial cheaters. They may dismiss the need for treatment, emphasizing the importance of identifying untreated mental health disorders or inadequate mental hygiene. - If a partner has cheated once, it's essential to be cautious and not assume they've changed since the past mistake.

Dealing with a Serial Cheater: - Prioritize physical safety and cease sexual intimacy to avoid health risks. Both partners should undergo testing for sexually transmitted infections (STIs). - Encourage the cheater to undergo psychiatric treatment, including biological work-up and talk therapy, to address the underlying causes of their cheating behavior. Therapy is also recommended for the betrayed partner to process the trauma and avoid becoming trapped in the cycle of cheating. - Avoid making future plans or commitments until both partners are confident that the cheating behavior will not recur.

Moving Forward: - Prioritize self-care, focus on emotional recovery, and seek therapy to address the emotional toll of being with a serial cheater. - Consider professional support from resources like Infidelity Survivors Anonymous and the Infidelity Recovery Institute, which provide support groups and structured recovery programs for individuals and couples affected by infidelity. - Seek support from loved ones and allow them to help you take care of yourself during the recovery process.

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